Thursday, February 25, 2010

3rd Marking Period, 2nd Article, April Fools

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3rd Marking Period, 1st Article

THE PRODUCT OF A SNOWSTORM


What, I ask you, is a girl supposed to do on the sixth day of a snowstorm when she cannot safely leave her house? There can be many answers to this question, many productive, and not all legal.


So let me rephrase the question: What is a girl to do on the sixth day of a snowstorm that wouldn’t have the cops beating down her door? That’s better. You couldn’t possibly answer that question with something illegal.... unless you added “and not get caught” to the end, I suppose... You know what, let’s move on. I could spend hours phrasing the question differently and there would still be ways to answer it illegally.


Needless to say, I was stuck inside today with nothing to do. I tried aimlessly wandering my house, but I soon grew bored of that when my parents found me and tried to get me to do something productive. How absurd. Productivity would simply not do on a snow day.


Then I tried getting something to eat. I opened the fridge, saw nothing I wanted, opened the pantry, and, again, saw nothing I wanted. I tried the fridge again, hopeful that something new would have magically appeared since the last time I looked. Much to my surprise, I still saw nothing I wanted. Shocking? I think so.


It was then that I realized I was out of ideas. So I figured, hey, maybe my brother Collin will know what to do! I found him in front of the TV and proceeded to sit on him until he answered me. I may not seem big, but 100 pounds on a 75 pound boy can do some major damage on a long-term scale.


He said that I needed to get off of him immediately or suffer the consequences. In all honesty, I was scared of my 12 year old brother. I was also scared of whatever “the consequences” were, so I left him alone, disappointed and still bored.


Do you know those little boxes that your mouse can make on your computer desktop? They are the answer to the imaginatively bankrupt, and I was making those boxes for at least half an hour. Now, in my defense, it’s a very addicting activity.


After making boxes, I had an epiphany, if you will. I would make a blog! It would take up at least an hour of my time and it was legal. Brilliance, right?


So a blog is the end product of hours of boredom on a snow day. I hope you’re happy, Collin, for not giving me anything better to do. That disaster is all your fault. I love you. Maybe.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Second Article, 2nd MP: The Woes of a Journalist: Coming up with Article Ideas

Have you ever sat and stared at a computer screen, trying to think of something to write your next article about? That was me, just five minutes ago. I had searched every news website, googled “article ideas,” and even asked my mom. After all of that, I was still at a loss. What could I write that would still be relevant in two months, when this article would be published? What topic would be long enough and interesting enough? Why couldn’t I think of anything?

In the past two years in journalism class, I have learned that writing articles is much more difficult that it seems. You may be thinking, “Oh, writing stuff to put in a newspaper is easy! All you have to do is grab something off the internet, change a few words, and you’re done.” However, I am the person who gets to tell you that you are wrong. There are many things to take into account when writing. You need to make sure that your article won’t be outdated by the time the newspaper is published, you need to make it interesting, you need to be creative, and, contrary to most people’s beliefs, you can’t just steal things from other, professional newspapers. That’s called plagiarism, but that is a topic for another day.

I am thoroughly convinced that I am not the only person that this writer’s block happens to. When I look around the journalism classroom, I frequently see kids frantically searching news websites, to no avail. I see kids just sitting there, lost in thought, trying to come up with an article idea. I do know that one thing that is running through everyone’s mind is, “I wish I could just make a word search,” but if we let everyone do that, our newspaper would be gone, and in its place would be a puzzle book. I’m not sure that the dean approves of a whole class devoted to puzzle-making.

Every writer in the world has a time where they are stumped for an idea. It’s not just middle school students. It’s a nice feeling to know that if you were to call up Stephen King or J.K. Rowling and ask if they were having a writer’s block, there’d be a good chance that they’d say yes. Then you think, if a famous writer has writer’s block, it’s okay if I do, too. This is somewhat encouraging, until you realize that you, unlike them, have a deadline to make.

I cannot sit here and tell you that I have a cure for the dreaded writer’s block. However, I can tell you some things that I tend to use as inspirations. Sometimes an article of mine is written based on a funny joke I heard that day, a story a family member shared, or something that a character in a movie said. Something just usually sparks me, and I go with it. It may take ten minutes to figure out, or it may take ten days, but I can always use things that I hear around me.

Occasionally, when I’m lucky, I will have an “AHA!” moment. This is when, after thinking for hours, a completely random idea will come to me. Therefore, it requires minimal thinking. I think it’s safe to say that I like when this happens.

You could also try asking your friends for ideas. Other people’s brains are a goldmine for new, fresh concepts. They break you from your usual way of thinking and make you think out of the box.

So yes, it was five minutes ago that I was picking my mom’s brain for things to write about. It was when she was finally out of article ideas herself that she said, “Why don’t you just write about not having anything to write about?” And that is what I did.

Sunday, December 13, 2009

First Article, 2nd MP: To Be or Not to Be

*Still has a few kinks, but it's basically done.

When you ask a small child, about kindergarten age or so, what they want to do when they grow up, you’re likely to get the same four answers: Veterinarian, Astronaut, Firefighter, and, last but not least, Ice-cream Man.

To be a veterinarian.
What little kid doesn’t want to play with a small, cute, furry puppy? When they picture coming into the job, they see themselves playing with dogs, cuddly cats, and long-eared bunny rabbits. They think they’d make a lot of money for simple games. It seems the job would be all fun and games and the only work involved would be a well-placed band-aid now and then. Just remember, not all is what it seems.

Not to be a veterinarian.
After 11 years or so of hard school work, internships, and studying, the job really starts. You walk into your first day and encounter blood, needles, feces, urine, and some grumpy animal owners. They don’t want to be at the vet, and if you’ve got a weak stomach, neither do you. Have you ever even pondered having to put down animals? Many kids would say, “Oh, I’ll just work with the animals, not with the killing of them.” Newsflash: You don’t have much of a choice.

To be an astronaut. That’s when you get to fly at the speed of light, bounce around in moon shoes, hang on a star, discover aliens, and encounter the Star Ship Enterprise. If a cow can jump over the moon, why can’t they? Why wish upon a star when you can fly past one? You’d get all those perks, plus free astronaut ice-cream. Just remember, not all is what it seems.

Not to be an astronaut. Astronaut ice-cream is actually very unappetizing, and before you can fly at the speed of light, you need hours of training in a pressurized vessel that makes you light-headed and gives you the strong urge to “blow chunks”. One that is completed, you need to be chosen to be on a spaceship. Let’s just say that there are quite a lot of people in line for that.
Have you ever ridden the Gravitron ride? Multiply that feeling by 1000, and you’ll have the approximate feeling of a takeoff. Who needs a facelift after a trip to space?

To be a firefighter. Free rides on the cool red truck, sliding down a metal pole, happy Dalmatian dogs, and unlimited amounts of water hoses for those hot summer days. Those are the thoughts running through the minds of children when they say, “I want to be a firefighter when I grow up.” Just remember, not all is what it seems.

Not to be a firefighter. Have you ever tried picking up a full grown man and carrying him out of a burning building, all while he was screaming and thrashing about frantically? I can’t imagine it’d be very enjoyable. How about that large trampoline that they catch people with? Does that really work, and how long to you really bounce up and down? Not to mention that you’d be a very smelly person at the end of a hard work day.

To be an ice-cream man. You’d get to ride around in a highly-decorated, musical truck all day long, all summer long. You’d get all the Firerockets and Chipwiches that you wanted, and you wouldn’t have to work when winter came. Talk about an ideal set-up. Just remember, not all is what it seems.

Not to be an ice-cream man. With this job, maybe everything is as it seems. What’s wrong with being an ice-cream man? You’d get to ride around in a highly-decorated (gaudy), (annoyingly) musical truck all day long, all summer long. You’d get all the Firerockets and Chipwiches that you wanted (as long as they came out of your paycheck), and you wouldn’t have to work when winter came (so now you’re unemployed). Talk about an ideal set-up (with screaming children).

So, I ask you Cab students: What do you want to be when you grow up? If the job is a veterinarian, astronaut, firefighter, or an ice-cream man, you now have both the good and the bad side of the job. If your future occupation is none of the above, think carefully about your choice… very carefully.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

2nd Article

"Because I Don't Want To."

From ages 13 to 17, teenagers go into “I don’t care” mode. It’s the phase between lovable kid and responsible adult, and it is definitely the worst. It’s when kids stop doing chores, slack in their grades, and go “anti-parent”. And, just like any other stage in the life, there is a way to recognize it. This stage’s stamp of identification is simply the phrase “Because I don’t want to.”
To parents, it’s commonly known as the “devil phrase”. To kids, it’s just what you say to get out of going to Grandma’s house for dinner. “Because I feel like it” is an out to any question, a perfect way to not answer. But, no matter how many questions it answers, the script is always the same:

“Will you stop by the store on your way home, honey?”
“No.”
“And why not?”
“Because I don't want to.”

“Go take out the trash."
"No."
"Why?"
"Because I don't want to."

"Will you go fold some laundry?"
"Uh, no."
"How come?"
"Because I don't want to."

"Sweetie, go hug your Grandma."
"No."
"But why?"
"Because I don't want to."

Some parents would simply be stumped at their rebellious child, wondering why on Earth they wouldn’t do the simplest things. While it may seem that we don’t have reasons for our response, most times we do. I am here to help you understand a teenager’s “Because I don’t want to.”

“Will you stop by the store on your way home?”
“I don’t want to go because the neighbors practically live there. I’d run into them, and Mr. Stevens will spit while he talks, and Mrs. Stevens will pinch my cheeks and tell me how much I’ve grown.”

“Take out the trash.”
“I put a stink bomb in there, and it’ll erupt when someone takes it out. I was hoping Jerry would get it….”

“Will you go fold some laundry?”
“I am not touching Mom’s underwear.”

“Go hug your Grandma.”
“No thanks, she smells like moth balls and has that horrible whiskery mustache.”

So you see, while our answers behind our “Because I don’t want to”’s might not be the most selfless, ideal answers, you have to admit that they make sense. Now you know what this generic response from a teenager can mean, and next time you get this answer, remember that adults have their own vague replies, such as the famous “Because I said so.”